I have not had the greatest of stories to tell from my office, till now. This was a day never to be forgotten, first all my bosses were away on tour leaving me to do some much needed trolling before I have my review.
The morning started like any other office morning, checking a ton of emails and just getting pissed at some idiots who either fucked up or sweating my balls off if I made some error. However, today was a day not to be concerned about projects, artworks, dpns etc etc etc, this was the day, Manish, one of my besties from THE OFFICE shone like a bright beacon and brought about a ton of laughter and craziness.
#This really did feel like a kickass episode from the office where people owned Dwight or Gareth #
So there is this person working in office called Arjun, seems like a typical humourless office nerd, thin, bespectacled , short, the typical guy you would pick on in office.
Manish has had a kick ass time owning this guy, once he was staring at soap noodles, things that are used to make soaps,
Arjun: What is this?
Manish : These are soap noodles.
Arjun : So what do you do with them?
Manish : You eat them and then the next morning when you take a shit, you get a bar of soap out of your ass
Arjun : .............
Manish : Hahahahahahaha (walk away)
Recently we got our extension phones for the internal communication, Manish had been searching for just one guys number, that is right, Arjun, unfortunately his name was not on the list of numbers provided to us, saddened but certainly not broken, he found a novel way of searching for the number, off he went through his emails
Me :What the hell are you doing?
Manish : Dude, that guy had taken over from someone, (reads one email and gets the number of the guy he took over from)
NOW STARTS THE FUN
The number comes out to be 4055, in a jiff Manish calls him up
Manish : IS this Arjun Roy?
Arjun: Yes it is
Manish : Ok (slams the phone down)
We all burst into laughter
A few minutes later we get Neha , another of our colleagues who is part of the group to call up Arjun, initially she was a little reluctant but how can you resist some craziness in the office?
So she calls him up
Neha : Hello?
Arjun : Hello.
Neha : Please provide 4 cups of coffee at the 12th floor (Slams the phone)
We all laugh extra hard, since there are only 11 floors in our building. We actually had to stop this tirade and work for us to stop laughing like some crazy hyenas .
I had to tell Manish to calm down and let him live or he would write a mail the next day stating he would not require the extension line.
Manish though was not done, now he did not target Arjun on his extension, instead he called Arjun via his own extension on Arjun's mobile number, as soon as Arjun picked up the call since it was the office number , Manish goes "MEOOOOWWWWWW".
Mad laughter issues once again.
I can't face Arjun ever again without bursting into laughter, its craziness, its madness, its what I want my office to be, every damn day.
As I leave my office, I pick up the phone and dial in 4055,
Arjun : Hello
Me : Laughs and slams the phone.
Goes over to his floor, with Manish, looks at him, bursts into laughter and heads home.
A proper trolltastic day at the office
Friday, August 31, 2012
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Serious advise
I am the last person on earth from whom you should or would take advise but over the past couple of months, at least since I started working, epiphanies have been hitting me like a goalie gets hammered by some slap shots in a game of hockey ( yes I do love ICE hockey), anyways here are 3 important things to take note off and please do take them seriously, have been screaming these points repeatedly to people I meet, especially my niece who is thinking about a career.
1: LOVE YOUR SCHOOL DAYS : While most of the core group of readers would have already started attending college, if you are one of the few lucky people still in school, cherish every damn moment of it. Trust me, when I was young all I wanted to do was leave school and go to college/work, let me hit you straight, there is nothing better than school, love them assignments, love them exams, the worst that could happen to you there was a bit of a scolding but you would be off the next day. "Work" ended for you at 3 PM max, ok in the more important years it would be a little longer but your weekends were free, summer vacations were vacations and well you would have time for something called life.
Love school, don't pass attending everyday of school, you get hundreds of moments, make every day count, these days WILL NEVER RETURN AGAIN.
2: DO NOT PURSUE AN MBA FOR THE SAKE OF IT: Hell this goes out for almost every whoring post grad/grad course us Indians want, engineering, doctors and MBA's. The country is over run with them and if you do it from a college which is not elitist to say, you are fucked, paid low, worked more and given absolutely no respect. MBA's are a dime a dozen, do something which you actually want to do, even if it means starting with a lower package, the biggest obstacle is society but fuck that, its better than suffering later on, cursing every week day plus the work culture in India sucks as it is, 6 work days and all.
Another something like 40 years more of this work life for me, damn it.
3: WORK IS NOT ITS CRACKED UP TO BE: Talked about this in an earlier post, work is not as fun as it should be, especially when you are a young kid with no experience, just try and get into some domain which interests you else you are getting jacked on a regular basis because you are on the lowest point in the food chain and well everyone will eat you up for even the most smallest of errors.
The day I get a junior working under me, its gonna be a tragic life cycle for that junior, that's a certainly, all the anger is going to flow out like the puss that oozes out from a huge pimple on your face.
1: LOVE YOUR SCHOOL DAYS : While most of the core group of readers would have already started attending college, if you are one of the few lucky people still in school, cherish every damn moment of it. Trust me, when I was young all I wanted to do was leave school and go to college/work, let me hit you straight, there is nothing better than school, love them assignments, love them exams, the worst that could happen to you there was a bit of a scolding but you would be off the next day. "Work" ended for you at 3 PM max, ok in the more important years it would be a little longer but your weekends were free, summer vacations were vacations and well you would have time for something called life.
Love school, don't pass attending everyday of school, you get hundreds of moments, make every day count, these days WILL NEVER RETURN AGAIN.
2: DO NOT PURSUE AN MBA FOR THE SAKE OF IT: Hell this goes out for almost every whoring post grad/grad course us Indians want, engineering, doctors and MBA's. The country is over run with them and if you do it from a college which is not elitist to say, you are fucked, paid low, worked more and given absolutely no respect. MBA's are a dime a dozen, do something which you actually want to do, even if it means starting with a lower package, the biggest obstacle is society but fuck that, its better than suffering later on, cursing every week day plus the work culture in India sucks as it is, 6 work days and all.
Another something like 40 years more of this work life for me, damn it.
3: WORK IS NOT ITS CRACKED UP TO BE: Talked about this in an earlier post, work is not as fun as it should be, especially when you are a young kid with no experience, just try and get into some domain which interests you else you are getting jacked on a regular basis because you are on the lowest point in the food chain and well everyone will eat you up for even the most smallest of errors.
The day I get a junior working under me, its gonna be a tragic life cycle for that junior, that's a certainly, all the anger is going to flow out like the puss that oozes out from a huge pimple on your face.
Saturday, August 11, 2012
August 18th, WE RISE!
Not that its going to be a political movement that has wrapped this nation into this KFC twister that you just can't swallow cause it is bland and tasteless and basically pointless to eat[ when compared to the awesome zinger that is, never would I sully KFC's name at all or quality].
18th August will be a date to remember for most people like me, not the perverts but the football lovers.
The Premier League or the "Barclays Premier League" is to start, which means late nights watching that 11PM/ 2AM saturday night game, watching my beloved Liverpool come back to life and action weekend in weekend out, making sure my social life comes to a halt for almost 8 months making sure that I do not wander out during any of Liverpool's games and make sure I have no parties/family gatherings etc on saturday and sundays.
The season is going to have an adverse effect on me especially every monday, IF we play well and win, no issues I know its going to be a kickass weekend and at least would be able to shut people up at the office, not that a lot of office folk follow football since this is a cricket crazy nation, heaven forbid if we lose, I would not come online for a couple of days, not follow any sports section in the news and for sure I would not even watch any sports channel [Cue sportscenter and the likes talking about a poor performance]
On the bright side, at least my weekends will have some meaning and I will at least look forward to them apart from being an escape from office , a little bit of a break from the normal routine I have had for almost 3 months now with no football, yes formula 1 can cut in and make a difference but Football is football. Another positive to come is that all my anger, darkness, frustration [in the batman voice] will be out on display for the whole world, facebook and all as well as my parents to see, remember dad coming in to charge his cell at 2 AM, Yossi scores against Fulham in the 94th minutes and I go berserk.
Also every single football fan will become a manager for every single day of the season, every decision will be nitpicked and discussed over internet forums for weeks on ends, crazy amounts of abuse will be thrown around, nonsensical reasons will pop out, history will be re-written, brought up and abused like an amateur bdsm model.
Yes the season is about to begin, families will be forgotten, women all but negated and friendships will be tested over the course of 8 months.
Thank God for Football.
ITS TIME TO RISE
BRING ON AUGUST 18TH
18th August will be a date to remember for most people like me, not the perverts but the football lovers.
The Premier League or the "Barclays Premier League" is to start, which means late nights watching that 11PM/ 2AM saturday night game, watching my beloved Liverpool come back to life and action weekend in weekend out, making sure my social life comes to a halt for almost 8 months making sure that I do not wander out during any of Liverpool's games and make sure I have no parties/family gatherings etc on saturday and sundays.
The season is going to have an adverse effect on me especially every monday, IF we play well and win, no issues I know its going to be a kickass weekend and at least would be able to shut people up at the office, not that a lot of office folk follow football since this is a cricket crazy nation, heaven forbid if we lose, I would not come online for a couple of days, not follow any sports section in the news and for sure I would not even watch any sports channel [Cue sportscenter and the likes talking about a poor performance]
On the bright side, at least my weekends will have some meaning and I will at least look forward to them apart from being an escape from office , a little bit of a break from the normal routine I have had for almost 3 months now with no football, yes formula 1 can cut in and make a difference but Football is football. Another positive to come is that all my anger, darkness, frustration [in the batman voice] will be out on display for the whole world, facebook and all as well as my parents to see, remember dad coming in to charge his cell at 2 AM, Yossi scores against Fulham in the 94th minutes and I go berserk.
Also every single football fan will become a manager for every single day of the season, every decision will be nitpicked and discussed over internet forums for weeks on ends, crazy amounts of abuse will be thrown around, nonsensical reasons will pop out, history will be re-written, brought up and abused like an amateur bdsm model.
Yes the season is about to begin, families will be forgotten, women all but negated and friendships will be tested over the course of 8 months.
Thank God for Football.
ITS TIME TO RISE
BRING ON AUGUST 18TH
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
The tipping point, walking the plank and all that jazz
My last post would have given an indication of what is to come in the future, friends be going off to unknown lands, again to explore and learn about themselves and explore the world and expand their horizons.
So it is quite obvious, apart form the sleepover there would be the oh so spectacular night out. Normally confined to the weekend, we decided to move this party along to the greatest day of the week, the new party night , a freaking Monday, that too a monday in which I would have to update my weekly sales binders for the big honchos to see. Nevertheless I decided to take care of that way before our stipulated time to meet, ie 7 PM on the dot. We need more time since we planned to get drunk, or at least Babla, chintoo and Nagu did.
Things never go as planned and sure as hell I get a call in which I am asked to download this huge data dump which would have taken me a whole day.[ still doing it in parts] and I had to give it in 30 minutes, not going to happen I think to myself and I call chintoo to tell him we need to meet later
"Make it 8 PM, its gonna take me some time"
That 8 PM becomes 8:30 and at one time I had resigned myself to not being able to go out for the final drunken escapade for quite a while, my friends come a calling at 8:30, screw work, called the boss and left for an epic night out.
Grabbed a cab with Babla, Chintoo and Nagu and headed off to the favorite destination to get good food,[ especially duck] and cheap booze, Tangra, the chinatown of Calcutta, the ride was a good 30 minutes from my office but as usual the drive is anything but boring with a ton of stories, laughs and abuses flying about from one guy to another.
We reach our beloved Cin Shing restaurant in the middle of Tangra at around 9:15 PM, a desolate place with just the construction of a new flyover and the zooming cars whizzing by that would only provide us any sign of life around for around a kilometer or two.
Now getting to this place, the restaurant was hard, since the entire road was dug up and this moat had formed around the premises, we had to cross over a plank of wood, each scared that their fat ass might collapse the plank and we would end up in the much which would probably have had feces, vomit, urine, and a whole host of bacteria just floating about. Luckily the plank did not snap , I guess since I was praying to the Lord , we made it across is what matters I guess.
We walk in with just another group of guys like us waiting and hogging stuff off another table, taking a table at the corner, the first thing I eye up is the amount of soda or at least the variety of cola drinks they had in the cooler, last time I was here I had around 7 different fizzy drinks, this time I was out to beat my record.
The ordering starts with a ton of prawn chips and chicken fried wontons, while the other guys decide on drinking alcohol, I decide to start my carbonated madness with a bottle of Thumbs Up, the best selling indian soft drink, EVER!, chintoo goes for a fosters, babla and nagu decided to have Blenders Pride while downing a ton of chips and fried nuts, we also ordered the classic Peking Duck and some amazing fried fish with another round of wontons to go about, the food was the king, the alcohol was the mistress and I was there to face the madness.
The person first hit seemed to be babla, which is funny because he normally handles alcohol the best amongst the other 3, laughing hard, screaming out to us that "This is the highest high I have been in a while" and "I have never been this happy being high in a while", of course there is the ever so needed call to his new squeeze saying how much he really loves her and all, alcohol brings out all the secrets in em all.
Rohit also did the same route, called Bhabhiji up, spoke in this hush hush tone, probably about him running away to the US , we also had a chat with Bhabhiji, me being the sober one also acted the most crass by constantly abusing over the phone, not at her but at the other members of our club. Oh and rohit for some reason decided to have 3 beers and chugged em all down one by one, no waiting, then he goes berserk and starts hitting his head and shaking it about like some ants had entered his ear.
Nagu kept and played it cool, not talking much, just drinking, funnily he kept himself in control the best and didn't act freaky like Babla or chintoo did, however its because of him we came up, I came up with the line for the year, while Rohit and Babla are constantly teasing him about his "Kritika" , while I for once tried to reason and take his side, as soon as I said "Nagu......"
He shouts out
"Shut UP ADEEEEEM!!!!"
I tell him " You idiot for once listen to me, either you treat me like an equal in the group or treat me like a muslim", they all start laughing crazy.He still keeps denying he has a soft spot for the girl but finally after being drunk he does reveal that he and her are going to work in the same city, again, if that is not the lord telling him to move in with the girl for life, I don't know what is.
"Line of the night" says Chintoo, agrees Babla and Nagu.
While they keep on drinking, I have my own personal fight with the cold drinks , downed a thumbs up, fanta, sprite, 7 up and a Limca, I finally had to retire with another bottle of Thumbs up.I was so filled with a ton of soft drinks that I did not touch the next round of wontons although I absolutely love em.
While we decide to leave the premise at around 11 PM, something strikes chintoo and he says "Dude, that PLANK!!!!!"
"If I fall into the ditch with the water, do not pick me up and let me die there, DO NOT PICK ME UP, I CANNOT GO BACK IN THAT STATE"
So we climb down the stairs, Nagu has gone ahead of us while I try to take Babla along with me, he constantly abuses me "I don't need help fucking chut, move aside, I can control myself"
Rohit goes on a blitzkrieg and starts hitting me for no reason , we walk slowly towards the end of the road when Nagu shouts out "FAAAAAAKKKK man ADEEEEEEEEMMM"
"What happened?"
Nagu : "Dude those planks..... they are not there anymore, just some bamboo that is all."
me :"Stop fucking around you idiot"
Nagu " I am not joking"
Sure enough, some chuts removed the planks and we were stuck thinking what can we do to move across, luckily or unluckily we saw a pair of bamboo poles tied up above the ground with another on tied around waste high which we could use, Chintoo goes across, so does nagu, Babla is the one we are scared off and Chintoo eggs him on, comforting him he can do it.
Now its my turn, while I gingerly try to come across, Chintoo for some fucked up reason decides, lets have fun with the Musalman and starts shaking the bamboo sticks, I am scuttling across in fear of falling into a ditch while the bastard has a jolly good time laughing at my predicament.
We now have to walk around a kilometer against oncoming traffic going at around 60-70 KMPH and we are not on the pavement since there is no pavement, I am coming along with Babla to make sure nothing happens, he is on an abusing spree, showing everyone the finger, every car he is showing the finger and how he would fuck people, showing the indian F U sign, he pushes me away and wants to walk it alone.
We reach Topsia after a walk and take an auto to Park Circus, Babla loves the wind in his hair and is laughing his arse off for no reason, we get off the auto and now Babla does not want to go back home, its 11: 30 and he is insisting on going somewhere else, then he wants to have something sweeeeeet.
While the other 3 try to find a way back home, Babla vanishes and reappears with chocolates for all, Yay Willy Bonkers is back, abusing all the way infront of the Arsalan restaurant, hell he even wants to have shit ice cream, rohit has an ice cream, in his state of drunkeness he buys a mango ice cream thinking it was orange, while Babla had the same, Nagu and I had the safe chocbar, Babla is still not happy with his sugar intake for the night and buys 4 large Cadbury dairy Milk bars for all of us to have, While I hogged down mine and Rohit's since he did not want to have it, Babla kept his for later.
We took a cab back to Kidderpore, since I had to go home and get to bed for a long day in office, Babla again did not want to go back home, insisting on moving about, then he goes on berserk mode and starts to mouth of obscenities to the cab driver and tries to make him eat the chocolate bar he had kept with himself.
"Nahi, woh boka choda ko khana hoga, I have had enough of them bastards refusing to take us from one point to another"
We pacify him enough , although he does shout of abuses to random people, including police officers, tries to shove his leg outside the window of the car and almost beats nagu up for no reason, oh and I forgot to tell you, right outside the restaurant he tried to climb a lamppost, so there you go, the babla was finally released from his cage.
At a bridge Rohit sees a ton of graffiti and says
"You know how I can tell its the work of an STB student?..... its cause they can't spell for fucks sake"
True that.
When I dropped the 3 off at kidderpore before I took the cab to my place, babla shouts out one more piece of advise
"If the bastard has not had the chocolate yet, don't fucking pay the mother fucker"
Told like a true STB ite against a taxi driver who was wondering whether he would make it back alive or not.
While I thought this would/could have been the last ever night out like this, a pact has been made, every year from now on, ONCE at least once shall all us friends meet up and go on a night of drunken madness for 3 of the people and 1 person just trying to get them all back in 1 piece.
So it is quite obvious, apart form the sleepover there would be the oh so spectacular night out. Normally confined to the weekend, we decided to move this party along to the greatest day of the week, the new party night , a freaking Monday, that too a monday in which I would have to update my weekly sales binders for the big honchos to see. Nevertheless I decided to take care of that way before our stipulated time to meet, ie 7 PM on the dot. We need more time since we planned to get drunk, or at least Babla, chintoo and Nagu did.
Things never go as planned and sure as hell I get a call in which I am asked to download this huge data dump which would have taken me a whole day.[ still doing it in parts] and I had to give it in 30 minutes, not going to happen I think to myself and I call chintoo to tell him we need to meet later
"Make it 8 PM, its gonna take me some time"
That 8 PM becomes 8:30 and at one time I had resigned myself to not being able to go out for the final drunken escapade for quite a while, my friends come a calling at 8:30, screw work, called the boss and left for an epic night out.
Grabbed a cab with Babla, Chintoo and Nagu and headed off to the favorite destination to get good food,[ especially duck] and cheap booze, Tangra, the chinatown of Calcutta, the ride was a good 30 minutes from my office but as usual the drive is anything but boring with a ton of stories, laughs and abuses flying about from one guy to another.
We reach our beloved Cin Shing restaurant in the middle of Tangra at around 9:15 PM, a desolate place with just the construction of a new flyover and the zooming cars whizzing by that would only provide us any sign of life around for around a kilometer or two.
Now getting to this place, the restaurant was hard, since the entire road was dug up and this moat had formed around the premises, we had to cross over a plank of wood, each scared that their fat ass might collapse the plank and we would end up in the much which would probably have had feces, vomit, urine, and a whole host of bacteria just floating about. Luckily the plank did not snap , I guess since I was praying to the Lord , we made it across is what matters I guess.
We walk in with just another group of guys like us waiting and hogging stuff off another table, taking a table at the corner, the first thing I eye up is the amount of soda or at least the variety of cola drinks they had in the cooler, last time I was here I had around 7 different fizzy drinks, this time I was out to beat my record.
The ordering starts with a ton of prawn chips and chicken fried wontons, while the other guys decide on drinking alcohol, I decide to start my carbonated madness with a bottle of Thumbs Up, the best selling indian soft drink, EVER!, chintoo goes for a fosters, babla and nagu decided to have Blenders Pride while downing a ton of chips and fried nuts, we also ordered the classic Peking Duck and some amazing fried fish with another round of wontons to go about, the food was the king, the alcohol was the mistress and I was there to face the madness.
The person first hit seemed to be babla, which is funny because he normally handles alcohol the best amongst the other 3, laughing hard, screaming out to us that "This is the highest high I have been in a while" and "I have never been this happy being high in a while", of course there is the ever so needed call to his new squeeze saying how much he really loves her and all, alcohol brings out all the secrets in em all.
Rohit also did the same route, called Bhabhiji up, spoke in this hush hush tone, probably about him running away to the US , we also had a chat with Bhabhiji, me being the sober one also acted the most crass by constantly abusing over the phone, not at her but at the other members of our club. Oh and rohit for some reason decided to have 3 beers and chugged em all down one by one, no waiting, then he goes berserk and starts hitting his head and shaking it about like some ants had entered his ear.
Nagu kept and played it cool, not talking much, just drinking, funnily he kept himself in control the best and didn't act freaky like Babla or chintoo did, however its because of him we came up, I came up with the line for the year, while Rohit and Babla are constantly teasing him about his "Kritika" , while I for once tried to reason and take his side, as soon as I said "Nagu......"
He shouts out
"Shut UP ADEEEEEM!!!!"
I tell him " You idiot for once listen to me, either you treat me like an equal in the group or treat me like a muslim", they all start laughing crazy.He still keeps denying he has a soft spot for the girl but finally after being drunk he does reveal that he and her are going to work in the same city, again, if that is not the lord telling him to move in with the girl for life, I don't know what is.
"Line of the night" says Chintoo, agrees Babla and Nagu.
While they keep on drinking, I have my own personal fight with the cold drinks , downed a thumbs up, fanta, sprite, 7 up and a Limca, I finally had to retire with another bottle of Thumbs up.I was so filled with a ton of soft drinks that I did not touch the next round of wontons although I absolutely love em.
While we decide to leave the premise at around 11 PM, something strikes chintoo and he says "Dude, that PLANK!!!!!"
"If I fall into the ditch with the water, do not pick me up and let me die there, DO NOT PICK ME UP, I CANNOT GO BACK IN THAT STATE"
So we climb down the stairs, Nagu has gone ahead of us while I try to take Babla along with me, he constantly abuses me "I don't need help fucking chut, move aside, I can control myself"
Rohit goes on a blitzkrieg and starts hitting me for no reason , we walk slowly towards the end of the road when Nagu shouts out "FAAAAAAKKKK man ADEEEEEEEEMMM"
"What happened?"
Nagu : "Dude those planks..... they are not there anymore, just some bamboo that is all."
me :"Stop fucking around you idiot"
Nagu " I am not joking"
Sure enough, some chuts removed the planks and we were stuck thinking what can we do to move across, luckily or unluckily we saw a pair of bamboo poles tied up above the ground with another on tied around waste high which we could use, Chintoo goes across, so does nagu, Babla is the one we are scared off and Chintoo eggs him on, comforting him he can do it.
Now its my turn, while I gingerly try to come across, Chintoo for some fucked up reason decides, lets have fun with the Musalman and starts shaking the bamboo sticks, I am scuttling across in fear of falling into a ditch while the bastard has a jolly good time laughing at my predicament.
We now have to walk around a kilometer against oncoming traffic going at around 60-70 KMPH and we are not on the pavement since there is no pavement, I am coming along with Babla to make sure nothing happens, he is on an abusing spree, showing everyone the finger, every car he is showing the finger and how he would fuck people, showing the indian F U sign, he pushes me away and wants to walk it alone.
We reach Topsia after a walk and take an auto to Park Circus, Babla loves the wind in his hair and is laughing his arse off for no reason, we get off the auto and now Babla does not want to go back home, its 11: 30 and he is insisting on going somewhere else, then he wants to have something sweeeeeet.
While the other 3 try to find a way back home, Babla vanishes and reappears with chocolates for all, Yay Willy Bonkers is back, abusing all the way infront of the Arsalan restaurant, hell he even wants to have shit ice cream, rohit has an ice cream, in his state of drunkeness he buys a mango ice cream thinking it was orange, while Babla had the same, Nagu and I had the safe chocbar, Babla is still not happy with his sugar intake for the night and buys 4 large Cadbury dairy Milk bars for all of us to have, While I hogged down mine and Rohit's since he did not want to have it, Babla kept his for later.
We took a cab back to Kidderpore, since I had to go home and get to bed for a long day in office, Babla again did not want to go back home, insisting on moving about, then he goes on berserk mode and starts to mouth of obscenities to the cab driver and tries to make him eat the chocolate bar he had kept with himself.
"Nahi, woh boka choda ko khana hoga, I have had enough of them bastards refusing to take us from one point to another"
We pacify him enough , although he does shout of abuses to random people, including police officers, tries to shove his leg outside the window of the car and almost beats nagu up for no reason, oh and I forgot to tell you, right outside the restaurant he tried to climb a lamppost, so there you go, the babla was finally released from his cage.
At a bridge Rohit sees a ton of graffiti and says
"You know how I can tell its the work of an STB student?..... its cause they can't spell for fucks sake"
True that.
When I dropped the 3 off at kidderpore before I took the cab to my place, babla shouts out one more piece of advise
"If the bastard has not had the chocolate yet, don't fucking pay the mother fucker"
Told like a true STB ite against a taxi driver who was wondering whether he would make it back alive or not.
While I thought this would/could have been the last ever night out like this, a pact has been made, every year from now on, ONCE at least once shall all us friends meet up and go on a night of drunken madness for 3 of the people and 1 person just trying to get them all back in 1 piece.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
A journey ends, the other begins
Exactly 10 years ago I had returned back to the city of joy from my long tryst in the desert kingdom which I had grown to love over the 7 years I had spent there, starting a new journey here was never easy, shifting to a completely different country, meeting new people and relatives, trying to make friends and holy crap adjusting to a school without Air conditioning, life was tough, hell it was hell for quite a few days, you get a gist of the crap I have been through from my earlier posts, check out the earliest ones for the best stories.
So around 6 years I shifted to my new residence and since rooms got bigger , accommodating friends was no big deal, in fact this gave to the rise in the massive number of sleepovers, check out "sleepover" for a brief history of the same. This get together would involve a few friends staying over at my place, staying up late and eating a ton of food, drinking a ton of cola and abusing and sharing a ton of kickass stories since all of us were crazy enough to have crazy stories which we had to share.
The Nagu, Babla, Chintoo and I, the ultimate crazy group with a ton of nonsense to spread and cherish, those were the days of college stories, women,football, goofs, chutiyapanti , you get the drift.
Recently we had another sleepover, with all 4 of us present , Chintoo came up with a very important point,
"This could, actually it is the last proper sleepover we may EVER have"
Alas, it is the end of a journey, Chintoo is off to the US for 5 years to study and get his PhD, Nagu is off to Ahmedabad to work and Babla is busy touring the country, 5 years from now who knows what life holds for us all. Nothing will ever be the same again, its been a kick ass journey from college to work, while work may suck, its the weekends which people remember and it still is the same for us now, the last sleepover, the journey ends, we move on to another story of life its just this chapter which ends and which marriage beckoning for at least a few of us the story called the Sleepover , the activity, the long nights, the long stories we kept in just to share with one another over a few bottles of soda and ice cream , the abuses we sprayed on people and one another while the clock would strike 3 AM will now rest in memories.
Thou were a great friend, sleepover, thou shalt never be forgotten.
So around 6 years I shifted to my new residence and since rooms got bigger , accommodating friends was no big deal, in fact this gave to the rise in the massive number of sleepovers, check out "sleepover" for a brief history of the same. This get together would involve a few friends staying over at my place, staying up late and eating a ton of food, drinking a ton of cola and abusing and sharing a ton of kickass stories since all of us were crazy enough to have crazy stories which we had to share.
The Nagu, Babla, Chintoo and I, the ultimate crazy group with a ton of nonsense to spread and cherish, those were the days of college stories, women,football, goofs, chutiyapanti , you get the drift.
Recently we had another sleepover, with all 4 of us present , Chintoo came up with a very important point,
"This could, actually it is the last proper sleepover we may EVER have"
Alas, it is the end of a journey, Chintoo is off to the US for 5 years to study and get his PhD, Nagu is off to Ahmedabad to work and Babla is busy touring the country, 5 years from now who knows what life holds for us all. Nothing will ever be the same again, its been a kick ass journey from college to work, while work may suck, its the weekends which people remember and it still is the same for us now, the last sleepover, the journey ends, we move on to another story of life its just this chapter which ends and which marriage beckoning for at least a few of us the story called the Sleepover , the activity, the long nights, the long stories we kept in just to share with one another over a few bottles of soda and ice cream , the abuses we sprayed on people and one another while the clock would strike 3 AM will now rest in memories.
Thou were a great friend, sleepover, thou shalt never be forgotten.
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Reboot? BOOT it out
With half of Calcutta going crazy with a ton of superhero movies, Avengers most recently, it seems people have forgotten what taste actually is. I saw the avengers and while it was a decent enough movie, people started comparing it to Nolan's Batman, why? probably because they can't believe how a great movie or a series Nolan has made and the inevitable comparisons will come with crap movies.
This just went to a whole new level this week, while people have been gearing up for the new Spidey flick, reboot as it is called. The reviews were quite positive, I did not read any American reviews about the flick so I don't have a clue as to what the other side of the Atlantic has to say about the flick.
Spidey is just as good as Batman, if not a better superhero at least in being more of a "human" with emotions et all. Hell a paper [ a leading paper] even came up with these 2 comic books fans having a long arsed debate which barely should have been covered in the first place because these comic geeks are only in it because super heroes is now a fad, especially with the new Batman movie and the reboot[ again I said it] of Superman by Nolan.
So the entire city was gaga with the new movie, reviews were good, hell the comparisons started and there were some idiots saying the movie had a more human, emotional element of Spidey which was missing from the last 2 spidey movies, Tobey versions.
The hall I went to was a family hall and I had a ton of kids running about and screaming about spidey but If I was in the normal halls I visit I would have been screaming my lungs out as to how lame a movie this is, by the interval I was completely brain dead and by the end of the movie, I knew I had amazingly wasted 2 hours of my life and this was probably one of the worst sueprhero movies I have seen.
Garfield, as the ladies say is cute but dear lord how have they massacred the movie, Peter Parker was a geek a nerd, someone who would not stand up for himself, ok lets fuck that all up, screw the comics and the canon and lets make him this stand out guy who stands out for right and all. Then the part of being an anchor for Aunt May, in this entire movie, Aunt May is shown for the exact amount of time as Irfan Khan, go figure, seems she was not an important character at all, and Irfan is there just for the Indian audience, they knew spiderman 3 was huge in India, so just put an Indian actor with a few lines and not an important role, hell even a blind man with no talent could have done that role.
Also this movie showed that being a superhero is easy as hell, PP [parker] easily makes his costume, his web device and all, no problems at all. And of course you DONT need a secret identity to be a superhero, in the movie, PP was without his mask with his suit on for almost all the fight sequences. Screw hiding the face, let every person in New York see what or who spidey really is.
The final bit that pissed me off is these sequences of Spidey and Connors, Connors post lizard has control over what he does and follows spidey, finds out it is Parker, again, you dont need to hide your identity do you? Follows him to school and tries to destroy him, which he fails with, the climax of the flick is just as lame , wont spoil that , go and watch it yourself to believe how lame and predictable it turns out to be.
Oh and being a Superhero movie, this is going to have a sequel, oh dear lord.
PS: This movie has had one of the best openings for a foreign flick in Indian screens, even beating the last great movie which was just as crummy but now looks like a far superior movie, Spidey 3. Roll on with the sequel.
This just went to a whole new level this week, while people have been gearing up for the new Spidey flick, reboot as it is called. The reviews were quite positive, I did not read any American reviews about the flick so I don't have a clue as to what the other side of the Atlantic has to say about the flick.
Spidey is just as good as Batman, if not a better superhero at least in being more of a "human" with emotions et all. Hell a paper [ a leading paper] even came up with these 2 comic books fans having a long arsed debate which barely should have been covered in the first place because these comic geeks are only in it because super heroes is now a fad, especially with the new Batman movie and the reboot[ again I said it] of Superman by Nolan.
So the entire city was gaga with the new movie, reviews were good, hell the comparisons started and there were some idiots saying the movie had a more human, emotional element of Spidey which was missing from the last 2 spidey movies, Tobey versions.
The hall I went to was a family hall and I had a ton of kids running about and screaming about spidey but If I was in the normal halls I visit I would have been screaming my lungs out as to how lame a movie this is, by the interval I was completely brain dead and by the end of the movie, I knew I had amazingly wasted 2 hours of my life and this was probably one of the worst sueprhero movies I have seen.
Garfield, as the ladies say is cute but dear lord how have they massacred the movie, Peter Parker was a geek a nerd, someone who would not stand up for himself, ok lets fuck that all up, screw the comics and the canon and lets make him this stand out guy who stands out for right and all. Then the part of being an anchor for Aunt May, in this entire movie, Aunt May is shown for the exact amount of time as Irfan Khan, go figure, seems she was not an important character at all, and Irfan is there just for the Indian audience, they knew spiderman 3 was huge in India, so just put an Indian actor with a few lines and not an important role, hell even a blind man with no talent could have done that role.
Also this movie showed that being a superhero is easy as hell, PP [parker] easily makes his costume, his web device and all, no problems at all. And of course you DONT need a secret identity to be a superhero, in the movie, PP was without his mask with his suit on for almost all the fight sequences. Screw hiding the face, let every person in New York see what or who spidey really is.
The final bit that pissed me off is these sequences of Spidey and Connors, Connors post lizard has control over what he does and follows spidey, finds out it is Parker, again, you dont need to hide your identity do you? Follows him to school and tries to destroy him, which he fails with, the climax of the flick is just as lame , wont spoil that , go and watch it yourself to believe how lame and predictable it turns out to be.
Oh and being a Superhero movie, this is going to have a sequel, oh dear lord.
PS: This movie has had one of the best openings for a foreign flick in Indian screens, even beating the last great movie which was just as crummy but now looks like a far superior movie, Spidey 3. Roll on with the sequel.
Sunday, June 10, 2012
The long short
The summer has set in and its blisteringly warm in Calcutta, so what does one do at such a time? Come out with his "Summer collection 2012",unfortunately I did not have much options when it came to attire at home, no good shorts or tracks to wear in the pathetic weather that has hit the city, close to 40 degrees Celsius , its been like this for almost a month now, no respite it seems and the lowest temperature of 29 degrees is not much a fact to jump about.
So here I am chucking out a ton of my old clothes because some of them are winter wear and some are in pathetic condition , converting the ones in poor condition to cloths being used to clean up the house, I open and clear my wardrobe and what do I find?
I have no shorts at all, not boxers but shorts which I can wear at home, this is because I finally did chuck out the shorts I used to wear around 10 years back when I was playing football in the sand dunes of Dubai, in those days the shorts would reach my knees, now the same shorts barely cover my balls. So off they went and so did I to talk to my parents,
"I need new shorts"
"Not a problem" says my dad, he has a few friends in the complex in the whole clothing business and surely enough I get a huge selection of shorts delivered to my place a couple of days later.
Trying them on one at a time, typical parents commenting on what looks good and not, I finally like a pair of shorts which are again till my knees and they are of decent quality that I can wear the same when I do go outside to places like McDonalds or KFC.
When I tell my parents that I want more of the same in the same XL size, its like the earth has shattered and 2012 is upon us, ok well it is upon us but that is not the point, my parents can't seem to get the idea as to why I would want shorts till my knees, those are not shorts, they are quite large for you and well they are very baggy and loose fitting.
What they don't understand is that this is my master plan for saving money, you see, I did get around 4 pair of shorts of the size I wanted now the good part is that these shorts will serve me a lifetime, well not a lifetime but based on the fact above that a pair of shorts lasted for a good 10 years with rough wear and a whole lotta football matches in tough conditions, these new shorts will last longer since I don't play football anymore, retired from the game since I reached the high points of doing Cruyff turns on the tough hard concrete covered rooftops of Chintoo's house in Mansartala lane, back to the point, these are going to last me long and I wont have to buy a new pair in a long time, this is how we save money.
So here I am chucking out a ton of my old clothes because some of them are winter wear and some are in pathetic condition , converting the ones in poor condition to cloths being used to clean up the house, I open and clear my wardrobe and what do I find?
I have no shorts at all, not boxers but shorts which I can wear at home, this is because I finally did chuck out the shorts I used to wear around 10 years back when I was playing football in the sand dunes of Dubai, in those days the shorts would reach my knees, now the same shorts barely cover my balls. So off they went and so did I to talk to my parents,
"I need new shorts"
"Not a problem" says my dad, he has a few friends in the complex in the whole clothing business and surely enough I get a huge selection of shorts delivered to my place a couple of days later.
Trying them on one at a time, typical parents commenting on what looks good and not, I finally like a pair of shorts which are again till my knees and they are of decent quality that I can wear the same when I do go outside to places like McDonalds or KFC.
When I tell my parents that I want more of the same in the same XL size, its like the earth has shattered and 2012 is upon us, ok well it is upon us but that is not the point, my parents can't seem to get the idea as to why I would want shorts till my knees, those are not shorts, they are quite large for you and well they are very baggy and loose fitting.
What they don't understand is that this is my master plan for saving money, you see, I did get around 4 pair of shorts of the size I wanted now the good part is that these shorts will serve me a lifetime, well not a lifetime but based on the fact above that a pair of shorts lasted for a good 10 years with rough wear and a whole lotta football matches in tough conditions, these new shorts will last longer since I don't play football anymore, retired from the game since I reached the high points of doing Cruyff turns on the tough hard concrete covered rooftops of Chintoo's house in Mansartala lane, back to the point, these are going to last me long and I wont have to buy a new pair in a long time, this is how we save money.
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